Do I move or am I worried?

Recently my mom and sister went on a cruise without me. Since my dad died the 3 of us have gone on cruises together but this time I decided to not go. The destinations didn’t excite me, there were no dive options and I had just gone on vacation to Mexico (one of the stops). So I stayed home. Well, lo and behold, I missed them! It was only a week and I was so surprised that I really, really missed them!
I know you all are thinking ‘well they are your family, dummy, of course you’d miss them’. I would agree with you but add some information. For 17 years I was married to a man who didn’t really like his family. There was nothing wrong with his family, they just weren’t close, at all! I suspect he didn’t really like my family either solely because they were ‘family’. If they had been just friends he would have liked them (I’ll get into this psychology sometime!). And no matter what you believe, if you live with someone long enough you start to act and think like them. Maybe it’s just women who do this but I did it and I do get that it’s a type of brainwashing, but not done intentionally (maybe). While I was married, I didn’t see my family as much as I should have, we talked on the phone but visits were infrequent, largely because my husband at the time was always a pain in the ass when we went to visit. Toward the end of the marriage, I didn’t even bring him with on visits.
I’ve been working on changing my attitude over the last 4 years and have come back to appreciating my family and wanting to spend time with them. They are fun, nice and the only people who will put up with me when I’m being a bitch!
So I’m contemplating moving back home, into my own house, thank you! It’s a scary thought and a big one for me. I’ve always thought my sister and I would live out our old age together but that’s a long way away. I’m thinking of moving now, yikes! But my mom is getting older and I would like to spend time with her. My sister is like my best friend and the cost of living is almost half!
Do I move or am I just worried about something? That’s an oddball statement, you say? Yes, but…over the last many years I have had the desire to move to a small town, enjoy the peace and tranquility and slow down. Then each and EVERY time I have fixed some problem or problem someone and the desire to move goes away (dang, I really wish I had that psychology degree, this is so telling).
Yes, there are a couple things in my life that are bothering me but I’m not sure if that’s the problem or not this time. Fortunately, I can’t and won’t move soon and time will tell how this will resolve itself. Maybe I just need another big adventure and this would be it! CHANGE IS GOOD!